No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
