The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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