Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
