peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
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