I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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