My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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