Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
