I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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