We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
