oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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