So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize