There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
