it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
