Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I have aggressive nipples.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
