i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
