I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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