# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
