What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize