If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize