we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
