when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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