What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
