How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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