i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
