erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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