this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
