my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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