It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
