Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
