***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize
