I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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