If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
