Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i would punch a child for taco bell
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
