do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize