I love watching others lives come down to our level.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
