I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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