I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
My cat gives me a boner
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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