He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
not ubering you a puppy
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize