At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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