I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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