I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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