I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
