oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize