I cockslap morals
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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