just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
