Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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