He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
