i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
