Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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