So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
did i walk over a car last night?
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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