Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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