Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
